I haven’t been feeling so good for about 6 months. I’m 17 1/2 years old so I figure that for 17 years I’ve been just great … but then things started to happen.
I don’t want to go into the details … what’s the point, huh! What I want to do is tell you of the wonderful life I’ve lived with Herself and AuntJ and the love from my beautiful Allison and little Graham and all my human friends and my BFF, Roxie, who lives 2 doors away from me.
The one thing that really bothers me is not being able to run on my 14th-floor hallway track anymore. My heart wants to but my legs say no. I used to run up and down the hallway with my hair flying like Rita Haywood in the film, Gilda. Remember that scene when she flips her red hair around while dancing … but of course, you know my hair isn’t red, not even close. Pure white. Well, not all of the time, but a lot of the time, pure white.
I’ve had a WONDERFUL life with Herself and AuntJ. When I arrived from York, Pennsylvania at 6 months old, I really didn’t know what was going to happen. The first human I knew, Ann, used to feed me with a baby bottle because my dog mom was tired or something. So, I quickly came to trust humans. I remember her crying when she handed me to Herself to go to my new home. Everything was strange and new and yes, very loud in New York City. I just felt that the two humans who carried me on the train and then a taxi (did you know I loved taxis, actually, cars of all types) and then home to 75th Street where I fell asleep and slept 14 hours … I heard Herself say, “she’s dead tired” and so I was. Not tired enough to remember peeing on Herself’s lap on the train … oh-oh! And she still kept me.
Right then, I knew I was home and would be loved.
I’ve received lots of love and learned instinctively to give lots of love and give and give and give it all around. It was so easy, and when I heard Herself say, “She’s a lover” I smiled and knew that was what I was going to be when I grew up … a lover. But, you know what? It was easy because love was all around me.
I’ve been forgetting things lately. And sleeping in the daytime and up all night. Herself and I would go out on sunny days and she would hold me while we stood in the sun so I would get it into my head “oh yeh, this is daytime.” Oh and I’ve been bumping into things. Hey, who put that there? AND, believe it or not, since I know every nook and cranny of my homes, sometimes I get lost and cry out so Herself or AuntJ come and rescues me. But, when I smell Herself and AuntJ nearby I know I’m safe … I’ve always felt safe.
Did I tell you about the time I got lost at AuntJ’s home? Apparently, AuntJ was so worried – she couldn’t find me anywhere. First, she called Herself and then called Frank, the doorman to come up and help her find me. He’s one of my favorite humans. Herself was on the phone, saying, “she didn’t walk out the door – she has to be there”. But, they couldn’t find me for the longest time. And it wasn’t that I was crying so they could follow the sound. No. What I did, silly me was crawl under the Christmas Tree and not being able to get out, I laid down and went to sleep. So, no crying from me, just silence. Frank, said “whats this white cloth rolled up under the tree” … and that’s when I was found. Everyone was happy, except me, they woke me up ………. It wasn’t time for me to wake up … I was having the dream of all dreams. Hearing lots of Ho Ho Hos in my dream.
I went EVERYWHERE with Herself and AuntJ. My little chic black bag (it had to be black, this is New York after all) was my passbook into everywhere … except for the Metropolitan Museum, when they wanted to see what was in the bag, they were ready to frisk me or something, and then they said no, she can’t come in to see the paintings she might bark at one. AND, to think the MET was celebrating THE YEAR OF THE DOG, and they wouldn’t let me in; me, a cultured, well-mannered Maltese with a 4000-year history to see pictures of what??? OTHER DOGS. What’s with that???
I would stay in my little black bag and sometimes fall asleep, although I enjoyed listening to all the talking going on around me. Nobody would know I was there. I was listening and commenting to myself about what I was hearing. I especially listened to Herself’s words and AuntJ’s. I’m very small, so my brain can handle just so many words at one time. Lately, I can’t be comfortable in my little black bag, because my back leg has been bothering me, so I couldn’t go to as many places.
I noticed lately I’ve been getting lots of kisses (more than usual) and hearing Herself whispering to me, while holding me, very personal things like: “I love you Mystical” “I love you very, very, very, very much” and “You are my darling friend” and “Thank you for all the love you’ve shown me” and many times lately I’ve heard her say, “It’s alright, I know you’re tired and aren’t feeling yourself like you once did, so when you are ready, I will let you go, whenever you think it’s right … and we will meet up again one day” That made me feel so much better. And, I always did what Herself told me and she was always right.
So, starting today, exactly 17 years ago since I came to live with Herself and AuntJ, June 18th, 2001, I won’t be waiting for you by the door. I will be waiting for you just inside Heaven’s Gate.
I’ll be very patient.
Very, very, very very very very patient.
Take your time.
No rush. Really!
Just believe I’ll be there waiting for you and when I see you, I’ll run over to you with my tail wagging like crazy and give you lots of kisses and jump up in your arms so happy to see you again.
I love you, all my two and four-legged friends, everyone,